Larry Crabb, Understanding People: Why We Long for Relationship. Zondervan, 1987. Referenced in: Church Conflict – Criticism, Difficult People, Difficult Conversations LifeandLeadership.com Summary Crabb, a clinical psychologist and popular Christian author, says our deep longings for true relationships inevitably lead to pain and hurt. Attempts to avoid the pain of sorrow, disappointing relationships, or conflicts
Kenneth Haugk, Antagonists in the Church: How to Identify and Deal with Destructive Conflict. Augsburg Fortress, 1988. Referenced in: Church Conflict – Criticism, Difficult People, Difficult Conversations LifeandLeadership.com Summary This is the long recognized standard on the subject of difficult people in congregations. Haugk defines “antagonists” as individuals who, on the basis of nonsubstantive evidence,
Katherine Crowley and Kathie Elster, Working With You is Killing Me: Freeing Yourself from Emotional Traps at Work. Business Plus, 2007. Referenced in: Church Conflict – Criticism, Difficult People, Difficult Conversations LifeandLeadership.com Summary Not all church leaders will find themselves in the same kind of difficult relationships that are typical of the private sector, but
Leroy T. Howe, Angry People in the Pews: Managing Anger in the Church. Judson Press, 2001. Referenced in: Church Conflict – Criticism, Difficult People, Difficult Conservations LifeandLeadership.com Summary This is a unique volume discussing the place of anger among church members. It neither justifies nor demonizes this powerful emotion, but explains and illustrates how it
Blaine Allen, When People Throw Stones: A Leader’s Guide to Fielding Personal Criticism. Kregel Academic and Professional. 2005. Referenced in: Church Conflict – Criticism, Difficult People, Difficult Conversations LifeandLeadership.com Summary Criticism of leaders is usually prevalent in church conflict. Allen helps readers evaluate and respond appropriately. Chapters cover when you can’t take anymore, when you’ve
Guy Greenfield, The Wounded Minister: Healing from and Preventing Personal Attacks. Baker Books, 2001. Referenced in: Church Conflict – Criticism, Difficult People, Difficult Conversations LifeandLeadership.com Summary This is an insightful resource for ministers who have been deeply hurt by their experience in ministry, not only by personal attacks but also abusive churches. It seems to
Steve Saccone, Relational Intelligence: How Leaders Can Expand Their Influence Through a New Way of Being Smart. Jossey-Bass / Leadership Network, 2009. Referenced in: Communication, Healthy Behavior, Forgiveness Leadership Development Through Communication Competence LifeandLeadership.com Summary The fact that this resource was produced by Leadership Network attests to its quality. It also comes highly recommended by
Craig E. Runde and Tim A. Flanagan, Developing Your Conflict Competence: A Hands-On Guide for Leaders, Managers, Facilitators, and Teams. Jossey-Bass, 2010. Referenced in: Church Conflict – Leadership, Preaching, and Worship in Church Conflict LifeandLeadership.com Summary This is a high-quality set of resources produced by the Conflict Competent organization, in association with the Center for
Roger Phelps, More Light, Less Heat: How Dialogue Can Transform Christian Conflicts into Growth. Jossey-Bass, 1999. Referenced in: Church Conflict – Communication, Healthy Behavior, Forgiveness LifeandLeadership.com Summary The title conveys the idea quite well, that instead of the “heat” of inflamed arguments, the church should pursue intentional ways of bringing people together for reasonable dialogue.
Margaret J. Wheately, Turning to One Another: Simple Conversations to Restore Hope and Future. Expanded Second Edition Berrett-Koehler Publishers, 2009. Referenced in: Church Conflict – Communication, Healthy Behavior, Forgiveness Church Leadership Strategies – Large Group, Whole Systems LifeandLeadership.com Summary This is an interesting book that was partly encouraged by 9/11 and the growing forms of
