Robert D. Dale, Surviving Difficult Church Members. Abingdon Press, 1984. Referenced in: Church Conflict – Criticism, Difficult People, Difficult Conversations LifeandLeadership.com Summary Dale identifies six types of individuals who often create unpleasant situations for church leaders – the chronically lonely, the insecure and cliquish, the passive-aggressive crazymakers, the openly hostile, the apathetic, and the hyper-traditionalists.
Arthur Paul Boers, Never Call Them Jerks: Healthy Responses to Difficult Behavior. Alban Institute, 1999. Reference in: Church Conflict – Criticism, Difficult People, Difficult Conversations LifeandLeadership.com Summary Boers writes about difficult behaviors from a surprising and refreshing angle. He seeks to avoid the trap of overreacting and labeling others, and focuses on the self-management of
Larry Crabb, Understanding People: Why We Long for Relationship. Zondervan, 1987. Referenced in: Church Conflict – Criticism, Difficult People, Difficult Conversations LifeandLeadership.com Summary Crabb, a clinical psychologist and popular Christian author, says our deep longings for true relationships inevitably lead to pain and hurt. Attempts to avoid the pain of sorrow, disappointing relationships, or conflicts
Kenneth Haugk, Antagonists in the Church: How to Identify and Deal with Destructive Conflict. Augsburg Fortress, 1988. Referenced in: Church Conflict – Criticism, Difficult People, Difficult Conversations LifeandLeadership.com Summary This is the long recognized standard on the subject of difficult people in congregations. Haugk defines “antagonists” as individuals who, on the basis of nonsubstantive evidence,
Katherine Crowley and Kathie Elster, Working With You is Killing Me: Freeing Yourself from Emotional Traps at Work. Business Plus, 2007. Referenced in: Church Conflict – Criticism, Difficult People, Difficult Conversations LifeandLeadership.com Summary Not all church leaders will find themselves in the same kind of difficult relationships that are typical of the private sector, but
Leroy T. Howe, Angry People in the Pews: Managing Anger in the Church. Judson Press, 2001. Referenced in: Church Conflict – Criticism, Difficult People, Difficult Conservations LifeandLeadership.com Summary This is a unique volume discussing the place of anger among church members. It neither justifies nor demonizes this powerful emotion, but explains and illustrates how it
Gary Preston, Pastors in Pain: How to Grow in Times of Conflict. Baker Books, 2005. Referenced in: Church Conflict – Leadership, Preaching, and Worship in Times of Conflict LifeandLeadership.com Summary Most resources on conflict present strategies on how to assess, resolve, or manage the issues, but do not equip the minister to deal with emotional
Blaine Allen, When People Throw Stones: A Leader’s Guide to Fielding Personal Criticism. Kregel Academic and Professional. 2005. Referenced in: Church Conflict – Criticism, Difficult People, Difficult Conversations LifeandLeadership.com Summary Criticism of leaders is usually prevalent in church conflict. Allen helps readers evaluate and respond appropriately. Chapters cover when you can’t take anymore, when you’ve
Guy Greenfield, The Wounded Minister: Healing from and Preventing Personal Attacks. Baker Books, 2001. Referenced in: Church Conflict – Criticism, Difficult People, Difficult Conversations LifeandLeadership.com Summary This is an insightful resource for ministers who have been deeply hurt by their experience in ministry, not only by personal attacks but also abusive churches. It seems to
Emma J. Justes, Hearing Beyond the Words: How to Become a Listening Pastor. Abingdon, 2006. Referenced in: Conflict – Communication, Healthy Behavior, and Forgiveness Leadership Development Through Communication Competence LifeandLeadership.com Summary Justes turns to the biblical image of hospitality for a theological grounding of the practice of listening. From this theology, she derives The Four
