Peter L. Steinke, How Your Church Family Works: Understanding Congregations as Emotional Systems. Alban Institute, 2006. Also, Healthy Congregations: A Systems Approach. Alban Institute, 2006.
Referenced in: Emotional Systems, Self-Differentiation
LifeandLeadership.com Summary
These two volumes by Steinke preceded Congregational Leadership in Anxious Times and were reprinted to coincide with its release. They develop the basic principles of emotional systems that are applied more extensively by Congregational Leadership. In How Your Church Family Works, Part One, chapters 1-5, Steinke explains the concepts of emotional systems. The first chapter covers the contrast between straight-line (linear) thinking and systems (mutually influenced) thinking, the role of homeostasis, how members of a system are wired together, the alone-together continuum, self-differentiation, and anxiety and reactivity as brain functions. He then spends an entire chapter on the separateness and closeness continuum, looking at the extremes of emotional distance vs. emotional fusion, and the centered balance of relationships whereby one defines self (healthy separateness) and touches others (healthy closeness). This is related to the popular concept of boundaries. Next he explains the “generational torch” or how one’s emotional functioning tends to handed down through the generations of one’s family of origin. The next chapter deals with the same principle of centered balance in the polarities of stability and change (including the issue of triangulation), clarity and compassion (including the issue of toleration of pain) role of cultural and congregational anxiety in church conflict. Part Two looks at the “Congregation as an Emotional System,” showing how each of the concepts described in Part One play out in congregational life.
Healthy Congregations begins where his first volume left off. He presents ten principles of health, how to deal with corporate anxiety, and the role of spiritually and emotionally healthy leaders in influencing the church’s emotional competence. Of particular value is his discussion of Infectious Anxiety, which discusses problems such as murmuring, gossip, secrets, accusations, and triangulation.
It is hard to overstate the importance of Peter Steinke’s writings in understanding the role of emotional systems theory in congregational leadership. One may find pieces of these two original volumes a bit technical, e.g. the information on brain science. Those who give Steinke the benefit of the doubt, however, usually come away grateful for his insights.
How Your Church Family Works: Understanding Congregations as Emotional Systems
From the Publisher
Drawing on the work of Bowen, Friedman, and his own many years’ counseling experience, Peter Steinke shows how to recognize and deal with the emotional roots of such issues as church conflict, leadership roles, congregational change, irresponsible behavior, and the effect of family of origin on current relationships. Discover why working relationships may be “stuck” in certain behaviors. Psychologically sound, theologically grounded, and practically illustrated with case studies, How Your Church Family Works will help you better understand how your congregation works and how to keep it healthy. Featuring a new preface and a fresh redesign, the book is a classic work by one of the most respected names in congregational consulting.
Healthy Congregations: A Systems Approach
From the Publisher
In this sequel to How Your Church Family Works, Peter Steinke takes readers into a deeper exploration of the congregation as an emotional system. He outlines the factors that put congregations at risk for anxiety and conflict. Learn ten principles of health, how congregations can adopt new ways of dealing with stress and anxiety, as well as how spiritually and emotionally healthy leaders influence the emotional system. Featuring a new preface and a fresh redesign, this book is a classic work by one of the most respected names in congregational consulting.
About the Author
Peter L. Steinke is an internationally respected congregational systems consultant who has also served as a parish pastor, an educator, and a therapist for clergy. He is the author of the best-selling books How Your Church Family Works and Healthy Congregations.
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